May Stork Alert

Congratulations to all families logged in October 27 through November 1, 2005 - referrals are here! Best wishes to you and your new additions!!!

6 days of referrals means there are now 169 LID days ahead of us to be matched. Current guesstimates are that our referral will come sometime between April and October 2008. There is still no word on us clearing the review room at CCAA. In fact, we're holding our breath - we heard of two families with April LIDs being asked for updated medicals including bloodwork because they were "too old". These people's medicals were completed a month after ours. Our agency hasn't had any such requests for April families so far. Fingers crossed!

Earth Day Every Day!

Welcome to Earth Day 2007! Earth Day is every day, really...ever since the Big Blue Marble, Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom and the anti-litter commercial with the crying Native American I was hooked. Hooked on a place so incredibly beautiful with never ending things to discover. I wish more people were hooked on nature. We're destroying it...fast. We need to embrace it and preserve it for ourselves and future generations...

We've all heard "if every person just does one thing". I'm calling BS on that one. Why can't each person do more than one thing? Why can we all do lots of things? Environmentally conscious options are nearly mainstream - they're everywhere - they're affordable and often free! So I'm calling out to all my blog readers - don't do "one thing" - do as much as you can starting now so that when we visit the parks and preserves with our children they can experience the wildflowers and trees, the frogs and the fishes and all else that creates that sense of wonder in all of us...

• Recycle paper, cans, glass, plastics - most communities have pick ups or drop off locations to make it easy;
• Change your light bulbs to the new energy efficient kind - and don't forget to recycle them or include them with your household hazardous waste - do not throw them in the trash;
• Shut off the lights when you leave a room;
• Turn the water off when you're brushing your teeth or shaving;
• Use Energy Star appliances;
• Drive a high mileage, low emissions vehicle - doesn't have to be hybrid to make a difference;
• Use organic lawn care and gardening methods and products - they work just and well, and in the long run they work better than hazardous chemical based methods;
• Plant native grasses and flowers - after establishing they are far hardier than other ornamentals because they evolved for your climate - that means they ultimately use less water and work to keep them beautiful;
• Buy organic and locally grown produce as much as possible - buying organic sends a message that we don't want all of those unnecessary chemicals in our food and buying local supports local family farms and reduces the pollution needed to get that food onto your table;
• Don't litter (major pet peeve);
• Collect roof run off in a rain barrel to water plants and gardens;
• Take your kids outside, show them nature, let them explore;
• Ride your bike or walk instead of driving - to work, to the store, to the park.
• Eat less meat and eat naturally, humanely and sustainable raised meat - meat production is very resource intensive.

What are you all doing to reduce your footprint on the Earth?

Jacek and I drive a low emissions vehicle. It even qualifies for conservation parking at work! We're selling our second vehicle. We try to bike to the store to a friend's house when we can. We are almost done replacing all of our light bulbs with high efficiency bulbs - even our outdoor floodlights on the patio. We bought a small dishwasher for our small kitchen so we use less water to wash our dishes. Our neighborhood put a huge recycle dumpster in a nearby park so we started recycling everything - and reduced our trash by about two-thirds! We take our old paints, chemicals and florescent lights to household hazardous waste collection sites. We shut off the water when we brush our teeth. We collect rain from our garage roof to water our plants and gardens. We now have 2 compost bins and are considering adding a third. We have a native prairie garden in the backyard that attracts lots of birds, bees and butterflies. We grow and organic veggie garden every summer. We use organic lawn care methods and products. We buy organic and local produce. We eat far less meat and when we do eat it we buy naturally, humanely and sustainable raised meat and seafood. We spend time outdoors as much as we can.

Here's to Earth Day - Every Day!!!

ONE

One. One year ago today, on April 20, 2006, our adoption dossier that we had taken so many hours, days and months to prepare was officially logged in at the China Center for Adoption Affairs (CCAA). This is the date we began standing in the growing line that is China adoption. One year. Twelve months. Three hundred sixty five days.

We started the adoption journey in January of 2005. We honed in on China later that summer. Due to the "speed" of our first homestudy agency, it took us twice as long as it should have to have our homestudy complete so our dossier didn't go to China until April 2006, resulting in our Log in Date (LID) of 4/20/06...the start of our "paper pregnancy".

At that time the wait from LID to referral had just started to grow from 6-8 months to 8-10 months. We fully expected to be home with our child by now.

But here we stand. One year into our wait and we may only be half way there...or less. Ahead of us in line there are 175 LID days to be matched. Last month, only 2 LID days were matched. Referrals are sent about once a month. Right now there are far more parent dossiers ready to be matched than baby dossiers. Yes, there are still many many children in Chinese orphanages, but not all are eligible for international adoption. It requires paperwork on the part of orphanage directors and either they are not willing or do not have the resources to do more.

So we wait. We're still guessing we'll be matched this time next year. It's just a guess, of course and it could even be later than that. But we will continue to wait because at the end of this journey is our first child.

Say What?!

It comes with the territory. You choose to adopt you open yourself up to a seemingly endless array of inane remarks. Jacek and I are no exception. Since we first announced our intention to adopt we’ve heard a great variety of negative comments, judgments and directives from friends and family. While we don’t believe any of them had bad intention, we present them in our “Say What?” series as an educational opportunity for those outside of the adoption community.

By far the number one crazy comment we’ve received has been “You’re adopting – now you’ll get pregnant for sure!” (Um, we don't want to get pregnant!) The person then goes on to tell us of a friend of a friend of a coworker who adopts and then magically conceives and births a biological child. If you said this to us, don't feel bad - almost everyone did. Other not-so-innocent related comments we’ve received include “Just have your own!”, “I think you should [have your own]”, and “I was really hoping you’d get pregnant and forget this whole adoption thing.”

Some emotions that ran through my head in particular when I heard the comments included amusement, anger, annoyance, disbelief and sadness that there are people who will be in our child’s life who might think that she is second best because she does not share our genetic material or that we "settled".

We don’t see having a biological child as preferential to adopting. In fact, quite the opposite is true for us. Completing our family through adoption is our first choice. We’re what some call “preferential adopters”. We chose to adopt because we want a child (or two) and honestly don’t see the point of giving birth when there are so many orphans in the world in need of homes. We are not attached to our DNA and I have no desire to experience pregnancy or childbirth. That’s right, none. Never have had the desire, never will.

For others in the adoption community who have struggled with infertility, I’m guessing that the emotions associated with "now you'll get pregant" and related comments sting extra hard.

Stay tuned for the next installment of Say What?! when we'll discuss comments based on misconceptions about adoption...

April Stork Alert

Congratulations to families logged in October 25th and 26th, 2005! Your referrals are here!

Yes, you see that right - only 2 log in dates referred this month. Apparently there were an unusually large number of dossiers logged in at CCAA during these 2 days. The snails pace continues...

Birthday Surprise

Check out what Jacek brought home for my birthday! The flowers took my breath away and swept my frazzled mind back to Hawaii...perfection!

Thank you honey! I love you!

Beautiful British Columbia

We recently spent a long weekend in the pacific northwest - flying into Seattle then driving up to Vancouver to visit Jacek's dad. Our favorite was the day we spent at Whistler-Blackcomb - wow! Jacek and his brother spent the day skiing and his brother's girlfriend and I went on a dogsledding adventure. A rickety old bus took us down a dirt path, chained tires and all to the meeting spot. The sled trail went along a river. There were no sounds other than people and dogs - no planes, no cars, nothing but the river and trees and snow. It was peaceful and exhilirating at the same time.

We all met at the end of the day on the deck of one of the pubs near the bottom of Whislter mountain - it was great sitting outside under the table umbrella in the drizzle sipping beer and watching the skiers. The next day we ventured to Steveston docks in the rain to choose our fresh catch for dinner. We spent another day in the parks of downtown Vancouver and had a great seafood dinner.

BC is just beautiful with all of the evergreens, mountains, rivers, lakes and ocean harbors. Can't wait to go back for more!

11 Months LID

Our dossier has been logged in with the CCAA for 11 months. Next month perhaps we'll celebrate our one year LIDiversary - can't believe we're that close to a year!

Fur Kid Fiasco

Some of you already have heard...for those who have not, we have had to return our foster dog Zoey to the rescue organization. I came home last Wednesday to 2 terrorized cats and cat urine and feces all over the house. Odette was fine, just very afraid and soaked in her own urine. She is back to her normal self. Cleo did not fare as well. I suspect she tried to defend her sister against Zoey, who may have been trying to play as she did with her previous cat friend.

Cleo suffered a broken mandible (lower jaw bone) and a couple of puncture wounds. The break was right in the middle of the bone and according to the vet is not all that uncommon in cats. I took her to the emergency vet and the next day she had surgery at her regular vet to wire her jaw. The vet was unsure if it would work due to her age and bad teeth but said it was worth trying. She was able to securely wire the jaw and Cleo was up and looking around shortly after surgery. She came home that same day. She is doing well, and is eating. She's resisting her meds which tells me she's feeling as well as can be expected. She's a tough kitty. She will have the wire sugically removed in 6 weeks (well, 5 now). When I returned from my weekend trip to Vancouver (more on that soon) Cleo cuddled up to me and was purring as loud as ever and as usual couldn't get anough petting.

Tuesday suffered a yellow stinky head. Apparently one of the cats peed on her while sitting on top of the crate Tuesday was in. She got a quick head shampoo and is fine. She's being extra gentle with the cats like she knows something major happened to them. Other than that she's her regular happy go lucky self.

As for Zoey - we chose Zoey based on her profile listed with the rescue organization and based on email verification that she met all of our criteria for fostering. The night before this tragedy I received the relinquishment form Zoey's former owner completed when she gave her up. To my surprise and anger I discovered that none of the criteria were true. To make a long story a little shorter, Zoey was not crate trained, was not housebroken, had severe separation anxiety, was fearful of strangers, and although she lived with a cat before, she played rough with him.

Had these things been revealed to us initially we would not have chosen Zoey to foster. We were responsible enough to limit our acceptance and the rescue made a huge mistake by not paying close enough attention to the relinquishment form - perhaps it was because Zoey isn't a bully breed someone assumed they could take a short cut, I don't know. What I do know is that the rescue is waiting for my full explanation and documentation so that they can use this experience to better train their volunteers and avoid something like this from happening again.

As for me, last Wendesday and Thursday were the most traumatic days I've had for a long time. I still feel bad for Zoey and think that had she been evaluated and placed in a correct foster home she could have succeeded - I hope she will have that opportunity soon. The heartache I experienced driving Zoey back to the boarding facility was horrible. The heartache and guilt I experienced taking Cleo to the ER vet was even worse. It took me several days to recover and while I still feel sad for Zoey and Cleo I find strength from my little six pound black cat with the powerful will to survive.

If you are considering fostering or adopting a rescue dog, please do not let this discourage you - there are many wonderful dogs and cats in need of a good home. I truly believe this was an isolated incidence of someone in a rush. Both of my cats are rescues and are wonderful. Tuesday is a rescued pit bull and is the most amazing dog on the planet.

We're Foster Parents!

Today we became foster parents to Zoey. Here she is with Tuesday (Zoey is the one with freckles). She was relinquished to the rescue organization by someone who said she didn't have time for her because she's so high energy. We went to the boarding facility housing her to meet her just today. There we were in a HUGE play room alone with her. She circled us without coming anywhere near us then hopped up on a box in the corner shaking. She wouldn't even take her favorite treats from us.

Her favorite human eventually came in and she started warming up to us with the security of his presence. We took her for a walk and she met Tuesday and one call to the rescue organization and she was in the car with us. We adopted Tuesday from the same rescue 2.5 years ago.

We've been home for an hour and a half and already the girls are loving each other - they're chasing, wrestling, playing tug and giving lots of kisses. She likes us now, too. I'm so happy we were able to get her out of the kennel - kennels are just not good for dogs long-term. She had already been there for 2-3 months.

We'll keep you posted on the new adventures of fostering Zoey!

March Stork Alert

Congratulations to families with LIDs from October 14 through October 24! Your referrals are here! The China adoption community is abuzz with excitement and anticipation to see your babies' sweet faces!

For the rest, the referral pace continues to inch along, slowing like the freight train on the morning commute - you know the one that comes just as you approach the crossing with only minutes to make your first meeting...and after the gates are down it slows, mocking you...and now it's slowing even more and you can almost hear its evil chuckle...it's barely moving...a mile long string of cars inching along the tracks ever. so. slowly. You wonder if you'll even make it to work today...yup, that's what our wait is feeling like right now.

3/7 Update: Dossiers logged in through March 31, 2006 have been reviewed. Looks like we're definitely in the review room! Someone at the CCAA is going over our dossier with a fine toothed comb to judge whether or not we are worthy to adopt from China. This also means they're look at our photos - and several of you family and friends out there are in them! Smile!

QuALTing

I've given in. I'm making a 100 good wishes quilt. What changed my mind? Why, the ALTs of course...talk of funky fabrics and ground rules ruling out babyish, hard core girlie and commercial characters sucked me in. And you know what? So glad I joined the quilt cult...check out some of these fabrics - they are fun, funky and beautiful. They're going to make a fabulous quilt that our child will find use for beyond babyhood. Thank you to all of the ALTs who've sent very creative and loving wishes our way - we will treasure them always. As for family and friends, you all need to get on the ball - we've only received one quilt square and wish from your group. I've never quilted before, don't own a sewing machine and have no idea what I'm in for, so I need these fabric squares and wishes soon so I can start planning. And no worries - I have a sew savy friend willing to help.

10 Months LID

We've made it into the double digits - our dossier has now been logged in at the China Center for Adoption Affairs for 10 months.

Mardi Gras

Laissez le bon temps rouler!

Tuesday had a great time at our little Mardi Gras shindig last weekend - and so did everyone else. We had vegetarian jambalaya, hurricanes, king cake and lots of great conversation. It was my first try at jambalaya and I must say it rocked. It was so refershing to see everyone come out of hibernation. Bring on Spring!

And yes, Tuesday kept her collar and beads on all night - she's quite the party dog.

Kung Hay Fat Choy!

Wishing you all health and happiness in the year of the Boar!

The year of the Boar: is one of benevolence, one with a lot of 'feel good factor', one of "abundance" and a good year for business. Life in this year will be lived to the fullest and although there will be uncertainty it will be minimal. It is a rich year with impetuous acts, but care is recommended with any matters concerning money. The Boar is the symbol for great courage and integrity.

If referrals stay at their current pace, then it's probable that our child will be born in the year of the Boar or Pig. Here's what one site says about people born in Boar years:

Chivalrous and gallant, people born in the year of the boar are always flying the white banner of purity. Whatever their ambition, they do what they must with all the strength they have, for their strength is an inner strength that no one can overcome. There is neither left nor right nor retreat when a boar person sets out to do something. He has tremendous fortitude and
great honesty.

Boar people don't make many friends, but when they do, they make friends for life, and anyone having a boar-year-born person as a friend is indeed fortunate. Boar people don't talk much, but when they finally say something, they let it all come out at one time, and there is no shutting them up until they have finished. Like monkey people, they have a great thirst for knowledge. They study a great deal and on the surface are generally well informed. However, if their knowledge is probed, it will be discovered that what they knows is limited. The Japanese saying is that such a person is broad in front but has a narrow back.

Boar people are quite short-tempered, yet they have quarreling or arguments. They are affectionate and kind to their loved ones. They are shy and if they encounter any problems, they will not ask for outside help but will seek solutions to their problems by themselves. Boar people are advised not to get into lawsuits, for, being impulsive and hones, they will lose the suit to someone who is unscrupulous.

Mandarin Monday

I'm finding Mandarin class to be a lot of fun, especially the cultural tidbits he adds in here and there. In this week's class we each received a Chinese name - basically the teacher took characters that sound similar to our names - and we used brushes and paint to try our hand at creating our characters a la calligraphy. It was rather meditative after a while and I'm thinking I need a Buddha Board. We also drilled numbers and practiced saying them and translating into English.

So I leave you with 0-10 in pinyin: ling, yi, er, san, si, wu, liu, qi, ba, jiu, shi
And just for fun, 1101: yiqianlingershiyi
And, finally for you lottery players out there 1 million: yiyi

Zai Jian!

Here's a Thought...

If referrals continue at the current rate there's a very good possibility our future child has been conceived.

Early Spring!!!

As I look at the single digit temperature on the thermometer and feel the blow zero wind chills I'm thrilled to announce that the one and only, the authentic Punxsutawney Phil, the prognosticating groundhog has finally and for only the 15th time in recorded history predicted an early spring! Happy Groundhog Day to all!

January Stork Alert

Congratulations to all families with LIDs between September 28 and October 13, 2005! Your referrals are here! Let the fun begin!

CCAA has also announced that they've completed review of dossiers logged in through March 22, 2006.

This means there are 6 months and one week of LIDs in line for referral ahead of our LID of April 20, 2006...and it means that our dossier is likely in CCAA's review room - right now they're looking at our homestudy, our photos, our financial statement, our physical forms, etc. Cool, huh?

Mandarin Mondays

Ni hao! I started Mandarin class at the local community college last week on Monday nights. It's a fun class and already the teacher is trying to talk me into his Chinese cooking class so I can prepare good Chinese food for our baby - including congee (rice porridge commonly fed to children in China). I don't think I can swing two class nights a week, so I might have to wait until next session, but I do love to cook!

So far we've learned basic greetings and numbers - he says I have good pronunciation so far - I make a lot of little phonetic notes, which helps.

In China there are hundreds of dialects spoken. Mandarin is one of them and it is the official dialect of the country, therefore everyone learns it (even if they don't use it much in their local town or province). Regardless of dialect, the characters used for writing mean the same thing, so the character for apple in Mandarin is the same as the character for apple in Cantonese.

My goal is to be proficient in basic travel Mandarin and to be able to say some basic things to our baby when we're in China. Even if her orphanage uses a different dialect, Mandarin will sound less strange to her than English and may offer some comfort during her transition to our family. It will take a while to reach that goal. For now I'll be excited to go to Chinatown and have someone understand me when I say "hello" or "thank you" or "where's the bathroom" in Mandarin...speaking of Chinatown, I think it's time for a dim sum brunch soon....mmmmmmm.